


The Last Three and a Half Years

by dyella



Category: Last 5 Years - Brown, Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Angst, Crossover, Fluff, Gen, M/M, Musicals, Sherlock and John are the only present characters, a lot of angst to be honest, especially if you know the musical, other characters are only mentioned, yay fluff too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-27
Updated: 2015-02-11
Packaged: 2018-01-06 09:44:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 5,359
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1105318
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dyella/pseuds/dyella
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Sherlock jumped from the roof of St. Bart's Hospital, a lot of things changed, but perhaps nothing changed quite as much as the now-broken relationship between him and John. Three and a half years have passed since Sherlock and John first met under pretense of finding flatmates. With only broken pieces of their friendship left, the two friends independently reflect on how the past years have been -- John reflecting backwards through their friendship, and Sherlock moving forward. </p>
<p>This is a Sherlock version of The Last Five Years, the musical by Jason Robert Brown. This fic is entirely composed of rewritten song lyrics from the musical. John takes the place of Cathy, and Sherlock takes the place of Jamie. Hope you enjoy!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Still Hurting

**Author's Note:**

> So a month ago I saw this post on Tumblr: http://kingduncan42.tumblr.com/post/66139049701/sometimes-i-make-myself-laugh
> 
> and after some joking around with my friends, I changed a couple of lines to the song "Still Hurting" (from The Last Five Years) and found out the musical worked really well. So, as a result I sought out to rewrite every song from TLFY about Sherlock and John's journey for the past three and a half years. 
> 
> This wasn't specifically written as a JohnLock piece, however if you wish to read it as such, feel free. I tried to keep the nature of their relationship as open to interpretation as possible. However, there are no direct allusions to them being romantically or sexually involved. I tried writing it as close to the series as possible (with some conversations that happen inbetween episodes and events my own original ideas), so I did write it with John and Sherlock as just friends. However, I think you could definitely read this with them romantically involved as well!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John starts at the very end, two years since "the fall."

**Still Hurting - John Watson**

Sherlock is over and Sherlock is gone...  
I’ve long decided it's time to move on.  
I should have new dreams I can build upon--  
But I'm still hurting.

Sherlock arrived at the end of a fall.  
He was convinced that that would solve it all.  
Sherlock had left me with one final call,  
And I'm still hurting.

Was it all lies, Sherlock?  
What about things  
You deduced to be true  
I believe in you, Sherlock.  
I believe in you.

Sherlock ensured something wonderful died.  
Sherlock decides it's his right to decide.  
Thought I was just there along for the ride.  
Now I am hurting.

Go and hide and run away,  
Run away, run and find something better!  
Go and try to fade away,  
Fade away. Like it's simple.  
Like it's right...

Give me a day, Sherlock,  
Come back to life--  
Our life before the fall.  
Maybe I'd see  
How you could leave  
Two Twenty-One B  
With such empty halls.

 

Sherlock is over and where can I turn?  
Adding more scars for each day that I yearn.  
I said “don’t be dead,” but you haven’t returned.  
‘Cuz that doesn't change the fact;  
That wouldn't speed the time;  
You pulled off your final act,  
And I'm  
Still Hurting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some of the canon I had to make up, as there are still some pieces missing, many of which won't be solved until Series Three premieres. if there are minor details I can update after new canon has been established, I'll try and do so. Otherwise I'm keeping it as is. 
> 
> Thanks to my friend Michelle for beta-ing. I use transcripts provided by http://arianedevere.livejournal.com/ to make sure there aren't details I'm getting wrong.
> 
> I do not own any of these characters, nor the original content this piece has been influenced by. The Last Five Years belongs to Jason Robert Brown, and this adaptation of Sherlock Holmes belongs to Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss. This is only a piece inspired by both works. 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed! I will try to post all 14 "songs" by the time Series Three premieres on BBC One.


	2. Army Doctor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Whereas John's first song was starting at the very end, here we see Sherlock describing the beginning. This song takes place throughout A Study in Pink as Sherlock and John get to know each other

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sherlock's character is hard to write for in a musical setting, so naturally some of the way he says things will be a little out of character. However, I've tried to stay true to what his internal monologue and emotions might be. 
> 
> This one was one of my favorites to write! I hope you like it.

**Army Doctor - Sherlock Holmes**

I'm breaking my brother's heart.  
The more time I spend living alone,  
The more I know its coating in plaque,  
A pleasure far too great.

I'm breaking my brother's heart  
With every new body I’m probing and whipping  
Without a living pulse,  
And his “government”’s watching  
My moves every day.

If you had a tattoo, then I would tell you.  
If you had a shaved head? Easily deduced.  
You're back from Iraq, with that tan,  
Or Afghanistan,  
And your limp is mentally induced.  
Flatmates? Now we’re getting somewhere.  
I think that you might do.  
Thinking, "Hey! Hey! Army Doctor!  
I've been wanting a flatmate like you."

He should know that I play violin, and don’t speak for days,  
And harvest organs.  
Shouldn’t mention what’s in the fridge, the empty kitchen, dirty dishes and sleeping nude...  
But the injuries, dead bodies, gruesome murders, well, he might like.  
I might skip dinners on certain nights,  
And sometimes when I’m bored I’ll go and start fights.

  
But the minute I first met you,  
I knew you’d bring out my best.  
I've been waiting all day with the phone in my hand  
Actually hoping for a guest.  
I can be a little selfish.  
I've been beaten, I've been hit.  
My colleagues have suffered for all of these years,  
And I don't give a shit!

  
If you had a girlfriend, that wouldn't matter.  
To be quite honest, I'd probably lose track.  
I know your alcoholic brother left his wife for another--  
No, your sister? It’s always something like that.  
I guess I can’t _always_ be perfect.  
If that’s not a problem with you,  
Well then, Hey! Hey! Army Doctor,  
I've been waiting for someone like...

You, accepting my habits.  
You, helping solve crimes.  
You, you are the friend that  
I needed to find.  
I wanted to find!

If you did the shopping, that would be perfect!  
If you like to drink blood, leave it in the fridge.  
Take your medical education with my strength in observation,  
And combined we’ll go without a hitch  
Be my new flatmate! And I promise  
You’ll bid your dull life adieu.  
I say, "Hey hey hey hey!  
I've been waiting for a flatmate,  
I've been praying for a flatmate,  
I didn’t know how much I need a friend  
Like You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll be trying my best to post two songs a day until series three premieres. I still have a few more songs to write, but I'm really determined to finish by the first.
> 
> Again, thank you to Michelle for beta-ing and I used http://arianedevere.livejournal.com for transcripts.


	3. See, I'm Smiling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is approaching a full two years since Sherlock's death. John goes to visit the grave again, against his better judgment. He tries to assure himself that he is ok.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Obviously it hasn't been fully established how John has spent his time in the two years, when he met Mary, etc. This is strictly my idea of what may have happened.

**See I’m Smiling - John Watson**

I guess I can’t believe I really came,  
And that it’s almost been two years.  
See I’m smiling--  
I’m moving on without you here.

I got this new shirt with my girlfriend’s help.  
Still need a voice to obey...  
See, I’m laughing--  
I think I’m gonna be okay.

I mean I’ll have to try a little harder  
And leave things to forget,  
To make my life as special  
As when I first came to your flat.

I mean, I’ve gained a new companion.  
Who knows what else can be done?

I think you really would like Mary.  
At least now I finally got off.  
See, I’m laughing, and I’m talking  
To a gravestone, where you’re below,  
Bottom line--  
I’m doing fine.

Now I’ve got Mary it will be better,  
Things won’t feel so wrong.  
With all I've had to go through  
I’ll end up twice as strong.

  
And so I'll start again in her hands  
And just keep rolling along.

I really should be going soon.  
I just need a little time.  
Look, I’m better, if I have to  
Go move on to, to whatever,  
It's all right--  
At least tonight.

You know what makes me crazy?  
I'm sorry, can I say this?  
You know what makes me nuts?  
The fact that we could talk together,  
Home together,  
Sharing our night,  
Spending our time.  
And you had to choose your own damn selfish ending!  
No, you did!  
Yes, Sherlock, that's exactly what had happened:  
You could’ve proven him wrong,  
Not pulled this big stunt.  
Sometimes you can just be so thick!

No, Sherlock, you did not have to lie to beat Moriarty.  
That can’t have been the only way to go!  
You could have cleared up your name, must be at least one way.  
At least one that is not this fucking show!  
And you know deep inside it just drives me crazy  
That I won't get to prove you’re my honest friend.  
And not a fake, not a fraud!  
And the point is, Sherlock,  
That I can't go a single day not thinking of

You and you and nothing but you:  
“Defective” detective, you!  
"Wasn't he dangerous, wasn’t he great?  
A master deceiver!"  
You and you and nothing but you!  
Fragments and puddles of you,  
Pushing through alleys and falling from heights  
En route to the ground!  
And now...

 

I swear to God I'll never understand  
How I should stand here straight and tall,  
Without crying,  
And not feel anything at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks to Michelle for beta-ing.


	4. Remedied at Last

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This takes place during "The Blind Banker." Sherlock's life is certainly getting exciting as the work increases along with his growing friendship with John.

 

**Remedied at Last - Sherlock Holmes**

 

Did I just hear my text alert ringing?  
Did I see sirens go flying past?  
The sound’s so good I could just start singing.  
I think my boredom might be fin’lly  
Remedied at last! 

Online News writes of a Ghostly Killer.  
This trail is hot as a rocket blast.  
Much better than that Jaria filler.  
I think my boredom might be fin’lly  
Remedied at last!

It’s always, "Oh, no  
Step on the brakes,  
You ain’t got what it takes  
To solve this case.”  
They don’t know  
I’m five steps ahead.  
It’s still, "No! No!"  
Whatever I do.  
I barrel on through  
My clear disdain.  
I can’t stay on stand-by,  
My mind’s full speed ahead! 

Another case to put out this fire,  
To prove I’m more than a smug outcast.  
Another case and I couldn’t get higher!  
I think my boredom might be fin’lly  
Remedied at last.

I found my partner in crime  
And a landlady who loves me.  
Things might get bumpy but 

I stay and analyze every detail.  
I get Lestrade’s call when he can’t see the trail.  
Life is a breeze ‘cuz I haven’t yet failed--  
I won’t be the weaker one. 

Some people can't see replica art;  
Some people care and some are just smart;  
Some people can't tell the two things apart.  
I won’t be the weaker one. 

Oh, oh - stand back and take my cue!  
Oh, oh - what else are they equipped to do?

I’ve dreamed of beating out the high and mighty,  
Now cases practically fall at our door.  
Think I’ve made a friend, and God almighty,  
I'm doing things I never dreamed of before. 

I’m taking him to the circus later,  
I’ll crack the cypher exact word for word.  
Gotta find what connects these latest murders  
And prove to Dimmock why I was referred. 

I gave up smoking and have tried to commit.  
The rush is too great and even I must admit  
I see no omens.  
My ego's swollen!  
I am not the weaker one! 

And I think  
Well, well, what else is in store?  
Got all this and more and still I am bored.  
It's hard not to be sure  
I'm spinning out of control...  
Out of control!

I’m feeling havoc, I feel a hot fury.  
I sometimes wonder if I’m moving too fast...  
But I'm so happy I can't get worried,  
Because I’m thinking that my boredom--  
I think my boredom might be fin’lly  
Remedied at last!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to Michelle, as always, for reading these and telling me that they're lovely.  
> Again, I used http://arianedevere.livejournal.com/ for transcripts.
> 
> Oh, and I know the whole "replica art" thing doesn't come in until The Great Game, but I figured I'd throw in some foreshadowing. :)


	5. A Part of That

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John is very frustrated by his flatmate, but can't help but admire the brilliance within him. Probably takes place between "Hounds of Baskerville" and "Reichenbach Fall"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I severely underestimated how crazy my New Year's celebrations would be! I apologize that I wasn't able to update before the Series Three premiere (but what an episode, right?!). I don't have a deadline now, but I'll try to update as quick as possible. Hope you enjoy!

**A Part of That - John**

One day we're just like "Jeeves and Wooster".  
One day it's just a typical life.  
And then he goes off  
Inside his “mind palace”;  
Staring catatonic out the window,  
Barely even breathing all the while.

And then he'll smile:  
His eyes light up and deep within his head  
A thought is bred,  
Solutions come to light.  
And I'm a part of that,  
I'm a part of that,  
I'm a part of that.

Very next moment  
It never happened.  
He suggests dinner,  
He grabs my hand.  
Then he gets in a  
Cab straight to Sherlock-land,  
Forgetting I was trailing right behind him,  
Traveling all of London, logging miles.

And then he smiles,  
We share a look,  
And have a hearty laugh.  
Yes, he's a sociopath...  
But look what he can do.  
And I'm a part of that,  
I'm a part of that,  
I'm a part of that.

And it's true  
I used to follow in his stride,  
And even side by side,  
I take his cue.  
True, but though I question,  
Though I doubt,  
I think I might stick it out.  
That’s what friends do.  
And when I do,

Then he smiles!  
And where else would I go?  
I don’t know  
Why, but I comply.  
And then he smiles,  
And I put up with his fence  
While he inspects  
The world that's passing by.  
And I'm a part of that,  
I'm a part of that,  
I'm a part of that,  
Aren't I?

I'm a part of that.  
I'm a part of that.  
I'm a part of that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Michelle, you're still the best for beta-ing this.


	6. The Jewel Song

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sherlock tells John the story of an old case, the case of the blue carbuncle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YO so some of you have been reading recently and asking me to finish this up! I almost forgot about this. I'll be posting the rest over the remainder of the night.
> 
> The Schmuel Song was extremely difficult to adapt, so I went into a direction where I took an original Conan Doyle story of Sherlock Holmes and invented a scenario where Sherlock might've been telling John this story ...
> 
> Because it was so difficult, the song is condensed, with John interrupting halfway through. Hope y'all still enjoy!

**The Jewel Song - Sherlock Holmes (feat. John Watson)**

 

SHERLOCK  
(spoken)  
Fine, a story. A little Christmas Story.  
I call it “The Story of the Jewel, the Blue Carbuncle”

(sang)  
Peterson came ‘round Christmas morn’ with a goose and hat with initials stiched,  
The facts are these, at about four he happened upon a tiff.  
One man walked with goose in tow, wearing the hat with initials stitched.  
A smallish gang started a row, the man’s sole defense: a stick.

“Do you need any help?” Peterson had said  
As the man swung the stick above his head  
He smashed a display  
And quick, ran away  
Leaving his hat and goose  
Now Peterson knew the things must be returned  
He looked at the goose’s card, and this he learned

That the card said:  
Na na na na na na na na  
“For Mrs. Henry Baker”  
Na na na na na na  
And the hat was labeled “H.B.”  
Na na na na na na  
So Peterson went to find this Baker  
But soon, soon, he was run down  
For there’s hundreds of Henry Bakers in town

So Peterson came at Christmas morn’ with the goose and hat dear Baker ditched,  
The goose I had chose to ignore, but I held onto the hat  
I deduced Baker was well-to-do, but had troubles in his marriage  
The hat had possessed all the clues, the case was done, that’s that.

But Peterson burst back through the door,  
With an anxious cry, said “Wait, there’s more!  
I found this jewel I quite think you’ll  
Want to see at once.”  
In the neck of the goose he tried to stew  
He found a stone of scintillating blue  
I asked if he knew the stone’s value  
It was the lost carbunkle, this was true

And I declared  
Na na na na na na  
“We must go find Mr. Baker  
Na na na na na na  
This jewel has travelled very far  
Na na na na na na  
And if we find this Henry Baker

The jewel can be rightfully returned  
And we’ll bring back the case that had been adjourned  
And we’ll know whether Horner is free of crime  
We should find out the truth in no ... time

JOHN:  
Alright, what’s the point of all this?

SHERLOCK:  
I was in the middle of a story!

JOHN:  
Yes, but what’s the point of it? Get on with it.

SHERLOCK:  
Ahem.  
(back to song)  
Plenty have hoped and dreamed and prayed  
For a calm and happy marriage  
This jewel had caused a dangerous crusade  
An adventurous pursuit  
Take it from me, you seem afraid to go out on a limb... ovich  
Maybe your heart’s completely swayed  
But your head can’t follow through

But shouldn’t I want the world to see  
The brilliant man who puts up with me  
Don’t you think that now’s a good time to be  
The trained doctor that you are  
Say goodbye to clerical work at St. Bart’s  
Say hello to John Watson ... Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers, a veteran of ... Kandahar!

‘Cause I say  
Na na na na na na na na  
John you get to be happy  
Na na na na na  
I give you unlimited time  
Na na na na na na na  
Stop faking and go and be happy!

Spare your resumés on a stark white page  
Spare a life on minimum wage  
Take a breath  
Take a step  
Take a chance  
Take your time

(Sherlock gives John the blue jewel)

Have I mentioned today  
How lucky I am  
To have a... colleague ... like you


	7. A Summer With Sherlock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John thinks on his crazy life but loves it anyway

**A Summer With Sherlock - John Watson**

I could have bought a handsome flat  
Shop all day in Chelsea, imagine that?  
But it wouldn’t be as nice as a summer with Sherlock  
And a cold fridge filled with Karl, jars filled with his fingers

I could Holiday in the South of France  
I could buy myself some silky pants  
But it wouldn’t be as nice as a summer with Sherlock  
Where I’m solving the case of a slaughtered escort and her pimp: Wayne

I could have a satchel filled to brim with pounds  
Could be next in line to wear the crown  
Bounce around in ruby robes  
I could referee at every Fifa Cup  
Frequent every country club  
Still I’m certain I’d prefer to snub the elite  
So I could risk my life down on Baker Street

I could’ve stayed back overseas  
I could crawl the deserts on hands and knee  
But it wouldn’t be as awful as a summer with Sherlock  
Without food, or privacy, lounging around with you.

I saw your picture on the cover of The Guardian  
Under a sign that said “Check out this Detective”  
I took a look at the headline all about your hat, and then I had a laugh  
The girl who I was seeing, got uncharacteristically quiet  
And she said “The way he treats you, you oughta start a riot”  
So I smile like Mona Lisa, and I gently let her down

She wants me, she wants me, but she’s not gonna get me  
I just don’t have the time, I’ve got my own great life  
Look at me, look at him  
Oh bloody Hell, I guess this is where I am right  
I finally found something right

No, it’s not ideal, but I make my way  
I use the blog to release the strain  
Then I get back on my feet and pray I can make it to tomorrow  
Without getting shot at, or almost blown--

I might have found work as a nurse  
I could have been carried by a hearse  
But it wouldn’t be as hellish as this summer is gonna be!  
But the torture is just exquisite  
‘Cuz the thrill, I sure do miss it!  
So come on you prat, start a spat,  
Let’s get on the scene

With the fingers, Karl, Wayne the Pimp, and your faithful blogger -- That’s me!


	8. The Next Ten Minutes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This takes place right after the pool scene from The Great Game, and before A Scandal in Belgravia occurs.

**The Next Ten Minutes - Sherlock Holmes & John Watson **

SHERLOCK  
So that was Moriarty?  
Were you alright back there?  
No I haven’t  
There’s Chinese up a few blocks  
Have you had a chance to see Sarah?  
Let’s just leave  
Take a few moments

Flatmate...

Will you catch your breath with me  
For the next ten minutes  
For the next ten minutes  
We can handle that

Take in these few days  
Or just watch the sky  
While we sit and wait  
It’s a gorgeous night

And if we make it ‘til then  
Will you spare me, again  
Yet another ten?

And if you in turn agree  
To the next ten minutes  
And the next ten minutes  
Til the morning comes  
For now rest away  
Don’t yet choose to say  
You’ll stay or not

There are so many things you needn’t to go through  
But only am I complete when you come too

JOHN  
I don’t see all of your texts  
Stop expecting that from me  
I will have dates  
And if we stay flatmates  
Just please get some of the groceries

I’ll still let you take control  
I will still stay in the back  
But anything other than being strapped up to a bomb  
I will do

You might expect me to run  
It’s the most sane I can do  
I don’t know how anybody survives in this life  
With a flatmate like you  
I could protect and preserve  
I could say no and goodbye  
But why, Sherlock, why?

I will be your ally  
I’ll put it on the line  
I’ll risk my life  
Knowing I  
Very nearly died to save yours  
That I will do  
Together, with you

SHERLOCK  
Will you spare your time with me

JOHN  
Together

SHERLOCK  
For the next ten leases

JOHN  
Together, Sherlock

SHERLOCK  
For a million cases

BOTH  
Till the world explodes  
Till there’s no one left  
Who has ever known us alone

SHERLOCK  
There are so many things I’ll have to teach to you..

JOHN  
There are so many years I can’t believe weren’t with you...

SHERLOCK  
Had no use for a colleague

JOHN  
I have never felt alive

SHERLOCK  
I had always been alone  
That is, ‘til you

JOHN  
Til you

SHERLOCK  
Til you

JOHN  
Til you

BOTH  
Until you...

JOHN  
Did that really just happen?  
Have you even eaten?  
No, I hadn’t really the chance  
Can we just go and eat alone?


	9. A Miracle Would Happen/When You Come Home to Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sherlock going through a whirlwind of cases following his recent publicity. Roughly during A Scandal in Belgravia. John realizes how excited this friendship makes him.

**A Miracle Would Happen/When You Come Home to Me - Sherlock Holmes & John Watson**

SHERLOCK  
Everyone tells you that the minute you get famous  
Every other person in the world  
Suddenly finds you attractive  
Well, that’s not true  
It only affects the kind of people  
You never wanted to work with  
Who never even knew your name before  
And now they’re banging down your door  
And talking off your ear  
At least that’s what it feels like because you  
Will. Not. Help. Them  
In fact, you don’t even look at them  
Close your eyes, close your eyes, close your eyes  
Except you’re sitting there  
Carrying an allibi incognito  
And all of a sudden, this pair of breasts marches in  
Seducing you  
And you’re like “I don’t care!”

And in a perfect world  
A murder spree would happen  
And every other case would fly away  
It’d be me and my blogger  
And nothing else would matter  
It’s fine it’s fine it’s fine  
I mean, it’s boring  
And I’m fine, I’m fine, we’re fine  
I need a problem  
Just a challenge  
It’s just a challenge to resist  
Temptation

And I have to say that  
What exacerbates the problem  
Is that these different parties  
Want the center of attention  
To them I’m grand fromage  
And here she comes:  
“Let’s get a cup of coffee,  
I want to be a journalist!”  
And I’m showing her the front door  
I’m gesticulating toward the front door  
And then WHOOMP! There’s JOHN!  
‘Cause he knows  
(he always knows)  
And there’s that really awkward moment  
Where I hope to God he doesn’t encourage this  
(though of course he always does)  
And I don’t want to look mad in front of this woman  
Which is dumb -- I don’t care what she thinks  
Since I don’t like her anyway!

And in a perfect world  
A murder spree would happen  
And every girl would fear being shot dead  
And it’d be me and my flatmate  
And nothing else would matter  
But it’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine  
You know I need him  
It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s fine  
I swear we’re casual  
And we’re fine, I’m fine, it’s fine  
I have no problem  
It’s just a challenge  
A challenge for re-  
habilitation

JOHN  
When you come home to me  
Try not to be hostile  
And hope that for a while, I’ll stay  
When you come home to me  
With every batshit case  
To send me in your place, away  
Soon, a rage will rise anew  
Even greater than the rush I felt  
First meeting you  
And once again, I’ll go  
So we two can dine  
When finally you come home  
To me

SHERLOCK  
Just come here soon, Flatmate  
Finish up your post and follow me out the door  
Just swear you’ll be there soon, Flatmate  
Don’t give up on me yet  
Don’t want to crowd you, Flatmate  
You’re doing what you never got to do before  
So be here soon, I’m not falling  
If good old brother mine stops calling  
Don’t lose faith  
Don’t get down  
Don’t despair  
Just be there

And in a perfect world  
A murder spree would happen  
 And that day would finally be here  
And it’d be me and you  
Solving it together  
And the things we do  
Goin’ like we planned  
We’re gonna make it through  
And nothing else will matter  
We’ll be fine, we’re fine  
We’re fine, we’re fine, we’re fine, we’re fine  
We’re fine  
Just be here soon, flatmate  
Just swear you will


	10. If You Didn't Believe In Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now we're entering Reichenbach .... Sherlock pleads with John to come with him. This is based on the scene where he talks to John in their flat before Lestrade arrests them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I skipped Climbing Uphill! Unfortunately a couple of these songs felt like a stretch, or if I adapted them that I'd just be repeating a lot of the same ideas. This was the only song that didn't make the cut. Forgive me!!

**If You Didn't Believe In Me - Sherlock Holmes**

SHERLOCK  
There are people  
And they’ll be thinking I’m a crook  
And there’s a warrant they are obtaining  
And while you’ve made it very clear I should be leaving  
I am not leaving  
And that’s done

But what’s it really about?  
Is it really just Moriarty, or might  
You think the suspicions are true?  
You think I’m a fraud?  
What makes you feel more disappointed?  
To live life again with such boredom?  
Would disappointment come much easier  
To know you’ve been had?  
Well, why not talk to me?  
Talk to me.

If you didn’t believe in me,  
We’d never have gotten this far  
If you didn’t believe in me  
Then would you have followed me into the car?  
If you didn’t think I could be  
Everything I want you to see  
If you weren’t certain you should believe me now  
The fact of the matter is, John  
I wouldn’t be standing here now

If you didn’t believe in me  
Where would we have been all those nights?  
If you didn’t believe in me  
I’d walk out the door  
And surrender my rights  
But you never would let me go  
That’s the reason that I surely know  
You trust in me not to forego our deal  
It shouldn’t need my convincing  
To make you believe I’m real

Thought you wanted adventure, partner  
At some point down the line  
Don’t you have to just take  
A leap of faith with me?  
Don’t push me yet further from you...  
I’ll start cheering on your side, John  
Long as you support mine!  
Just believe me I’m real  
I’ve committed no felony  
I’ve done what I always said I would do

I don’t want you to hurt  
I don’t want you to leave  
But you know, if you leave?  
I think you’ll be fine.  
But hang on and you’ll see-  
I won’t make you wait to find out  
Whether you should have doubts  
If you listen to me  
No one else gives me courage  
No one’s got past my thick skin  
I will not fail and let you feel gullible, John  
Don’t let this end, before it begins

If you didn’t believe in me  
I guess that the storybook ends  
If you didn’t believe in me  
I never could have even called you my friend  
Said, “You’re a conductor of light”  
I’ve never needed light like tonight  
Love me or hate me, I know you won’t let me fall  
Is that something we can agree on, John?  
If you hadn’t believed in me  
I’d no longer be here at all  
[speaking]  
So what do you say?

...John?

JOHN:  
Of course I believe you. Nobody could fake being such an annoying dick all the time.

LESTRADE:  
Police!


	11. I Can Do Better Than That

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John recently moved in with Sherlock and is happy about his new life

**I Can Do Better Than That - John Watson**

JOHN  
My best friend had a little situation  
After our first year abroad  
She took a shot, and they sent her back home that summer  
Gwendolyn getting bored every minute  
Thinking, “Why am I here, oh God?”  
Now she’s a mom, driving kids  
All around in her Hummer  
She’s got a little cute flat with a welcome mat  
And a summer home by the shore  
She’s got a job at a book store, she works on call  
Just the settled-down facts of the settled-down life of the house-wife who’s getting bored  
When we both knew what we wanted  
It wasn’t like that at all  
Wrote Gwendolyn a “Get Well” letter  
Thinking I can do better than that

Not too long ago, I got shipped to the city  
Shoulder sporting a mighty bruise  
Got a room, got a shrink and got twenty times sadder  
Met a girl from before I joined the army, who looked like she had nothing to lose  
And my shrink said I might as well take her to dinner  
And I guess she was cute  
And I guess she was sweet  
Despite being brain-dead  
I had to turn her down, and I tried to disappear  
Still seeing my shrink while looking for work  
Every night a gun to my head  
I couldn’t bear any more time off  
Working on a “career”  
I had a thirst for a new endeavor  
Because I can do better than that

You don’t have to hide your cases  
You don’t have to block the news  
If every night’s the same as when we began  
Just bring me

You don’t have to clean the flat up  
I don’t mind if you deduce  
You don’t have to open the windows  
Just let me go where you go  
You don’t have to change a thing  
Just stay with me

It was you and you and nothing but you  
Adventurer lecturer you  
Finally I’ll have something worthwhile  
To get through each morning

You and you and nothing but you  
No substitution will do  
Nothing but cold, calculated, and sure  
The brains and the brawn, when the game is on!

I don’t need any lifetime commitments  
Marriage isn’t even in my sight  
You can even throw up all your walls and defenses  
I’m not here to put on any pressure  
But I know when a thing is right  
And I don’t even long to go back to those trenches  
With cold air in my lungs, running all over town  
Take a look at how far I’ve gone  
I will never go back  
Never look back anymore  
And it feels like my life led right to your side  
And will keep me there from now on

SHERLOCK (flashback)  
Think about what you wanted  
Think about what could be  
Think about what we can do  
Say you’ll move in with me

JOHN  
Think of what’s great about me and you  
Think of the bullshit we’ve both been through  
Think of what’s past because we can do  
Better!  
We can do better!  
We can do better than that!  
We can do better than that!


	12. Nobody Needs to Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Reichenbach Fall -- Sherlock's confrontation with Moriarty on the rooftop.
> 
> I'm SO sorry.

**Nobody Needs to Know - Sherlock Holmes**

Well, Jim, I made it  
I’ve solved your last problem  
Rich Brook -- It’s clever, a joke just for me  
Why not give up Jim?  
No use in waiting...

Look at us, standing here  
Provoking, pretending  
I cracked your code, and I’ll take you down  
You wrote a story  
Now I’ll change the ending  
You’re no more a king in a crown

Hold on, spare your guns  
I won’t run from your show  
All right, I’ll do what you need:  
Nobody needs to know

Give me one moment  
I won’t disappoint you  
Til I remember  
You could call this off  
Swearing and pleading that I know  
How to break you  
Too late, you found a way out

Hold on, just one call -  
All I have to say  
All right, I'm over, I'm done  
Tell her that I’m a fake...  
Everything is okay...

Give me one moment  
To keep me from shaking  
Look at me standing here, as the whole world quakes  
Perfectly balanced  
Will you do this for me?  
This note about all my mistakes

All that I have now  
Is one little corner  
One private room  
Left in my stoic heart  
Tell him I tricked him  
Watch as the phone falls  
I’m ready to blow this apart

Lose grip and I slip  
And faster I’m sliding  
Sliding and spilling  
And what can I do?  
Go back to home, John  
Forget I’ve denied you  
I’m sorry that I’ve lied to you

Hold on, don't cry yet  
Try and let it go  
All right - the panic recedes  
All right - everyone bleeds  
All right - Jim got what he needs  
And nobody needs to know  
Nobody needs to know

And since I can’t be a friend to someone  
Since I don’t belong to someone  
Then I’ll have to let go of someone  
Like you...


	13. Goodnight Until Tomorrow/I Needed to Rescue You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sherlock after faking his death -- John after the events of A Study in Pink.
> 
> again ... so sorry .....

**Goodnight Til Tomorrow/I Needed to Rescue You - John Watson & Sherlock Holmes**

JOHN  
Don't dare say goodnight again  
Leave this night clean and quiet  
He gets the last word  
He gets me to laugh  
But leave it for now

All I can say  
All I can feel  
Was repressed beneath my despondency  
Leave it at how  
I watched you through that window and shot...

And goodnight til tomorrow  
Goodnight ‘til the next case is solved  
And I will be waiting  
I will be waiting  
Goodnight until tomorrow  
Goodnight till I recall how to breathe  
And I have been waiting  
I have been waiting for this

I stood on a walking stick  
I struggled to keep my balance  
You’ve helped me back up  
You’ve helped me back up one thrill at a time

Finally yes!  
Finally now!  
Finally something takes me away  
Finally free!  
Finally he distracts from what stings  
And see what life brings

So goodbye until tomorrow!  
Goodbye until whatever may come  
And I will be waiting  
I will be waiting!  
Goodbye until tomorrow  
Goodbye until the morning sun  
And I have been waiting  
I have been waiting for this  
Waiting for this  
Waiting for you

SHERLOCK  
I had no time to even pack my bags  
Feel free to still use the bank account  
I know you’ve gone back to your shrink  
But there was no other compromise  
You’re not the only one who's hurting now  
There was nothing else that I could do  
You never heard how close you were to dying  
You never knew it was your only chance and

I needed to rescue you  
It’s all I ever wanted  
But I still haven’t rescued you  
No matter how I tried  
All I could do was leave you safe  
And let you go

I’m sorry that it died  
All I could do was call you,  
God, I wish you’d know  
John you were right  
John please just wait  
For me to show...

JOHN  
Goodnight until tomorrow!  
Goodbye til the next time we run  
And I will be waiting  
I will be waiting

SHERLOCK  
You never noticed just how far I fell

JOHN  
Goodbye until tomorrow!

SHERLOCK  
There wasn’t a way we both could win

JOHN  
Goodnight until I'm done thanking God  
For I have been waiting  
I have been waiting for you

SHERLOCK  
Goodbye, flatmate

JOHN  
For I have been waiting -  
I have been waiting for you

SHERLOCK  
Goodbye

JOHN  
I will keep waiting -  
I will be waiting for you

Thanks for the date [chuckles]  
I'll stand and wait  
Sherlock...

BOTH  
Goodbye


End file.
